The horse screams, "I will end you!" A man and his pet horse walk into a bar. Read more hilarious jokes from your favorite comedians. A better poker player could not exist The next day, the duck comes in once again and yet again demands, "I want to buy some peanuts!" "He's my seeing eye dog," the woman replies feigning offense. After he’s paid for their round and the two are sitting quietly, he asks her, “So how many have you caught today?” Once again, the magnificent animal picks up speed except this time her inexperience gets the better of her. A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what he’d like. As the Desperado saddles up, a local can’t help but ask, “Sir, what exactly was it you had to do in Houston?”, The Desperado narrows his eyes and hisses at the man, “I had to walk home.”. No! - The horse looks surprise. Horse walks into a bar, orders a beer, sits down at one of the tables, and starts reading his paper. The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. This would have struck him as odd, save for the fact that he … The bartender asks "What'll it be?" A horse!" ". Go away! A sandwich walks into a bar. I have this terrible sore throat.”, The doctor assures him, “It’s okay—you’re just a little horse.”. Without missing a beat, the woman replies, "They gave me a chihuahua?!". When they came out a minute later, the horse was wallowing in And the horse says "Yeah, well I fucked your. YOU PIECE O-! The bartender is a bit shocked by all this, but pours the beer, and brings it over to the horse, who proffers a ten dollar bill for it. And the bartender says "Well I just want you to get out!" A moment later, he and the In a booming voice the genie tells the man he has but one wish. So the bartender heads back out front and hands the horse a beer. The little girl looks up at the cop and says, "Nice horse you've got there, did Santa bring you that?" And bites the bartender in the throat. ", He says to the barmen, “Can I have a pint of beer please?”. ", E-flat walks into a bar. The lab owner strolls in with her dog and orders a beer. The startled horse is now in a dead run and the beautiful blonde finds herself hanging off to one side of the horse, her head just inches from the ground... catastrophe seconds away. The gorilla replies, "Well, at $9.85 a drink, I ain't coming back, either. men's room. You can’t believe that a horse can tend bar?” “No,” the guys says. The bartender sets him up, and the guy takes the first shot in the row and pours it on the floor. ", Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, "Did Santa get you that?" A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn’t say a word. The bartender is in shock, an actual horse just walked into his bar, sat down at the bar like a person, and ordered a beer in perfect English. He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The horse eventually finishes his beer and goes up to the bar to order another. A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" “She must be a poor old fool,” he thinks to himself, and out of the kindness of his heart, he invites the woman in for a drink. Stable tennis. To which the horse replies, "At these prices I'm not surprised.". “So what have you done with your life?” he asks the horse. Lucky for them all, when he steps outside again his horse has been returned. The shocked bartender points a finger his way in alarm and yells, “Hey!” The horse says, “You read my mind, buddy.” Horses and Bars Just Go Together Horses don't know the price of beer." and fines her $5. The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." OH GOD NO THE TABLES EVERYBODY GET OUT OH JESUS FUCK", The horse looks to the floor with a sad expression and answers: "My alcoholism is tearing my family apart.". The bartender says to him, “Y’know, we don’t get many horses in here.”, To which the horse replies, “At nine dollars a beer, I’m not surprised!”. A talking horse walks into a bar and approaches the manager. tears. The bartender says, "why the long face?" "Yes," replies the little girl. The bartender replies, a bit gruffly this time, "I already told you I don't sell peanuts." Years later, I joined the mounted police force in New York and helped keep the city clean.
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