That’s right. A week before the game, at our shit-smelling practice facility, while we were practicing our marching drills for Radio Row, that COCKSUCKER Modell sent an assistant to inform us that there was simply no room for the band, and he was sorry to get our hopes up. True to Ravens fashion, they’re gonna follow their terrible season by winning 13 games this year, all while keeping the underdog bullshit going. Some people are fans of the Baltimore Ravens. $96 million and this guy has probably spent ten bucks of it, all on oatmeal. To me, a Baltimore football team should be playing on a grass field, ultimately. During that lovely drought, Art Modell himself showed up at our practice camp (The beautiful, and not at all shit-smelling ‘Cow Palace’ at the Howard County Farigrounds) and giddily told us that he was proud of us, that we were part of the team, that we mattered to the fans, and that (and this is the most important thing) that if, now or in the future, if the Ravens ever made it to the Super Bowl, that he would pay to fly the band wherever it was being played. © 1996-2020,, Inc. ou ses filiales. Fuck this team. I spent the last two months of my deployment to the Middle East last year during the first two months of last football season. ISIS has a more congenial list of characters. Do you know how nice it is when this team has a lousy season and I don’t have to see them in the playoffs? The sun shines a little brighter. Also, this defense is still an aging trainwreck. You guys make the Steelers look like Pope Francis by comparison. And the Ravens are one of the most despicable franchises in sports. I also saw a grown man (in zubaz, not jorts) give an enthusiastic middle fingered, “Fuck You!” to a baby wearing a Steelers onesie. What’s new that sucks: REEFER MADNESS! What has always sucked: Frankly, I’m still not over the fact that this franchise shouldn’t exist. If this sport had any real drug testing in place, Terrell Suggs would test positive for every element on the periodic table as the man was obviously mainlining stem cells for koala fetuses two years ago as he somehow made it back in record time from a torn Achilles. This page was last edited on 3 July 2018, at 08:42. Since their first SB win in 2000, they’ve followed all three sub-.500 seasons with playoff berths, so Lonny from Dundalk won’t have much to bitch about, but that’s not gonna stop him from calling WBAL and raising hell anyway. Do you feel bad for them? It’s simply the fans. And then, in the offseason, the team formally proposed that eligible linemen be forced to wear a fucking pinnie out on the field. La stagione 2016 dei Baltimore Ravens è stata la 21ª della franchigia nella National Football League, la nona con John Harbaugh come capo-allenatore.Con la vittoria nella settimana 12 contro i Cincinnati Bengals, la squadra migliorò il record di 5-11 dell'anno precedente, ma non riuscì a qualificarsi per i playoff per il secondo anno consecutivo, un fatto che non accadeva dal biennio 2004-2005 A third string undrafted rookie outside linebacker getting his wisdom teeth out would be bigger news to the jorts-wearing fucks in this town than if Orioles third baseman, Manny Machado, was to win the MVP, Nobel Peace Prize, Congressional Medal of Honor, Mega Millions powerball, and die all in the same day. Flacco, who tore his ACL last season, was just handed a three-year contract extension with $44 million in guaranteed money. Des tiers approuvés ont également recours à ces outils dans le cadre de notre affichage d’annonces. If Stanley ends up being worth a shit and Flacco stays clean, the Ravens are a lock to win ten games and swipe a playoff spot from a cooler team. Did you know they even started their own pandering ladies fanclub called Purple? The following 140 files are in this category, out of 140 total. If the brightest of Ravens fans were to gather at the Greene Turtle, Ralph Wiggum would be most qualified among them to land the coveted position of Glen Burnie/Pasadena chapter president. Submissions for the Deadspin NFL previews are now closed. It’s fun to watch you morph into the leisurewear New York Giants. Man that feels good, Go Ravens. All told, Flacco has received over $96 million in guarantees in just eight seasons on the job. Les membres Amazon Prime profitent de la livraison accélérée gratuite sur des millions d’articles, d’un accès à des milliers de films et séries sur Prime Video, et de nombreux autres avantages. Here we have a town that was robbed of its original team and, in a supreme act of tone-deafness, compensated for it by fucking over an even more beloved franchise. The team made a big deal about the resurfacing like it would cleanse us from the evil of last season in a baptismal like fashion. Here is a photo of the Ravens first round draft pick with Donald Trump. No one gets stabbed to death. It’s like making fun of a clown. You’re not fooling anyone, Ravens. Imagine winning a Super Bowl and being remembered for a meme instead. And you know what? This 2016 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. À la place, notre système tient compte de facteurs tels que l'ancienneté d'un commentaire et si le commentateur a acheté l'article sur Amazon. Your coach: John Harbaugh. First, he tried to use the same tactic against Arizona, only to have the officials (wrongly) deem it illegal. I hate them. What’s the goddamn point? All structured data from the file and property namespaces is available under the. I’ve noticed that over the last few seasons I’ve come to look forward to this red light more than the game itself. It’s like taking in fresh mountain air for the first time. What a fucking loser. The birds sing with a little bit more cheer. like nothing happened. It was just a TV show, man. A mugging, drug use, mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, other various mouth-to-body-part acts, a woman in labor, more than one arrest, offers to “make me a man”, and just about any other stereotype you can think of. The New Browns are a hideous impostor team that is terminally unable to stop shitting on its own shoes. Vos articles vus récemment et vos recommandations en vedette. I think I spotted Terrell Suggs’s Achilles tendon on sale at a pawn shop last week. We’ll have to rely on names like Kamar Aiken and Marlon Brown for consistency with playing time. Yes, nothing bonds women together like burying the Ray Rice elevator video. We moved the statue of an NFL legend in order to make room for a statue of man convicted of obstruction of justice in the death of two men. It epitomizes what Baltimore is all about, the history of football in Baltimore. Next up: San Francisco 49ers. And buy Drew’s new book here. Afficher ou modifier votre historique de navigation, Recyclage (y compris les équipements électriques et électroniques), Annonces basées sur vos centres d’intérêt. And Breshad Perriman hurt his knee again. Veuillez renouveler votre requête plus tard. Merci d’essayer à nouveau. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Baltimore Ravens. AHAHAHAHAHAHA OF COURSE NOT. Needless to say, myself and many others quit the band on the spot, cursing Modell until the day he dropped dead. Passer au contenu Testez. Bonjour, Identifiez-vous. I had no idea life could be so pleasant. Behind Flacco is the notorious Ryan Mallett, who was cut last season by a team that couldn’t afford to cut any quarterbacks. Also, they forget that the offense carried those aging stars in the Super Bowl run in 2012. Files are available under licenses specified on their description page. Media in category "2016 Baltimore Ravens season" The following 140 files are in this category, out of 140 total. Sélectionnez la section dans laquelle vous souhaitez faire votre recherche. Il n'y a pour l'instant aucun commentaire client. But, honestly, I don’t care. How he has eluded national scrutiny for some of the shit he’s done that the locals know about is something I’ll never figure out. Donald Fucking Trump said Joe Flacco is elite. Even without seeing his face since Week 1, I still know that Terrell Suggs is still the ugliest human on earth. Un problème s'est produit lors du chargement de ce menu pour le moment. This team was subjected to some of the worst officiating in history last season, including a blown false start call that undeniably cost them a victory. Well, thanks to Flacco’s LAST contract, he was due to take up nearly $30 million in cap room—cap room that could be used to, I dunno, purchase a lineman or two to keep his knee from being vivisected. I dare you to find a more boring rich person. Your quarterback: Joe Flacco. He also sucked, but still: I dare you to find an organization outside of the Redskins that is clumsier when it comes to pretending to be ethical. Ravens fans were so spoiled by watching two of the best defensive players in history play together for 10 seasons that they can’t understand how the team isn’t able to draft this well (lucky) again. The best part is that Harbaugh is still so bitter about the Patriots beating him with creative formations two years ago that he can’t let it go. It’s a recognition of that.” It’s a bunch of fucking grass from North Carolina! I’ve seen and heard it all at that stoplight over the years. Not to mention Dennis Pitta’s hips will be sure to implode a few weeks into the season as we hopelessly tell ourselves this whole situation will be okay, and Ozzie does know what he’s doing. Pointing out all this stuff isn’t even fun anymore. The 10th layer of Hell would reject them and their purple camo pants. Veuillez vous assurer que vous avez saisi une donnée valide. Merci de réessayer plus tard. During the debacle that was last season, we had a huge press release about how we were getting rid of the turf at M&T Bank stadium. If I have to hear “Defense wins championships and why can’t they build a D like when Ray and Ed were here” one more time I may drown myself in terrible Natty Boh (yeah I said it, it’s shitty beer brewed in North Carolina, stop acting like it is some awesome local brew). You are the rich man’s Nic Pizzolatto. The existence of the Ravens is a wrong that will never be properly righted. Fuck this fanbase full of the least self-aware people on the planet so fucking hard. Even Roger Goodell is more deft at hiding his shitbaggery. And what are we left with? Nous utilisons des cookies et des outils similaires pour faciliter vos achats, fournir nos services, pour comprendre comment les clients utilisent nos services afin de pouvoir apporter des améliorations, et pour présenter des annonces. View the 2016 Baltimore Ravens football schedule at But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Baltimore Ravens. Comment les évaluations sont-elles calculées ? Impossible d'ajouter l'article à votre liste. P.P.S. If you need a clear sign that the world is a rotten place that isn’t worth fighting for, here you go. I was at O’Hare Airport once for a layover and was in the bathroom washing my hands when a large man walks in. Why hand that much money to a semi-elite monobrow with a gimpy leg? I watched that whole Super Bowl victory through “I should’ve BEEN THERE” drunken slurs. I worry that he might have chronic pain from all those knee injuries. The Browns are a comical mummy franchise, but the Ravens are a bunch of spoiled turds who win titles for a city that is most famous for letting cops use paddy wagons to play a real-life version of Mario Kart.

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