Q: How do you know when a foal is sick? Answer Save. A: Thoroughbred. A: A tale of WHOA! What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air? Does YAHOO use a RAY gun to DISINTEGRATE my Q&A's.......? 51. The horsepital. A: When it’s neck and neck. Q: How does a cowboy get a stallion to do odd jobs around the farm? The horse is a staple in most animal tales. Back to: Animal Jokes. "Sorry, can't let you in, either. Q: What do race horses eat? A: Old Neigh-vy! What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet? What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke? What happens to Pastors who eat chili dogs? Q: Why did the Anorexic blonde start eating hay? How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field? St. Peter shook his head sadly. A: Nightmares! 58. Q: What do you call a horse that can't lose a race? Enjoy! The Foxtrot. What’s the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse? Hay fever! So, in a moment of desperation the janitor peered his head out of the confessional and asked an altar boy, "Son, what does the minister give for oral sex?" Q: What do you ask a sad horse? 18. 85. Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth? That’s not my stable. A: A Little Whorse. 3. How many DEGREES do you NEED to JUGGLE flaming TORCHES......? 82. What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride? Q: Where do horses shop? 71. 70. Q: What's invisible and smells like hay? What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on? If you’re enjoying these horse jokes, you might like our popular article 17 OF Our Favorite Equestrian Memes. Q: Where do horses get their hair done? Q: What type of a computer does a horse like to eat? Horse Jokes. A: A Little Whorse Now you can easily and quickly add contacts from your email account (such as Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo etc. Being the helpful sort, the janitor agreed. Q: What do you ask a sad horse? Have you seen all jokes? The Blond Bank Robber and the Three Stalls. What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out? What kind of horse do you ride after dark? “Hey,” says the barman. What do calendars eat? A: He lays his cards on the stable. What were the ponies most excited for in the meal? I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup! You're riding a horse full speed, there's a giraffe beside you, and you're being chase by a lion. Yo' Mama is so fat, she tried to eat her chicken pox. 21. 69. Q: What do you call a horse that lives next door? Missa. A: Watch Me (Whip / Neigh Neigh) What did the ponies do when it was raining? A: With Southern Horspitality! Q: What do you call 144 horses in a box? Q: What kind of horses go out after dusk? How did the horse break into the mainframe? A: A burrito! 17. Then check out the top 101 funny horse jokes that will have you neighing! Q: Did you hear about the blonde water-polo player? Q: What do you call a scary female horse? What did the horse say when it fell? Q: Where do you put 2 horses that just broken up? 92. Q: What do race horses eat? A: Fast Food. Sherbet. 6. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. They travel through intergalloptic space. A: "Why the long face?" 46. Q: Why don’t racehorses wear underwear? 91. Hay fever. Q: What do you call a horse that lives next door? Fluffy Rover. Answer Save. A: A nightmare! What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land? What kind of bread does a racehorse eat? A: Horse farts. A talking horse walks into a bar one day. A: His horse drowned. Q: Where do you put 2 horses that just broken up? Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge? What was T-Rex's favorite number? The Conditions. "And so, here we are!". Q: What kind of horse likes to be ridden at night? Funny Horse Jokes. What do you call a horse that lives next door? 70. Q: How do you get a horse drunk? In a small cathedral a janitor was cleaning the pews between services when he was approached by the minister. 99. Thoroughbred. Q: What did the teacher say when the horse walked into the class? 57. 48. 9. A: He lays his cards on the stable. 22. 81. 15. Cause when I ride you'll always finish first. I think somebody just made it up. How do horses get to another star system? What’s a horse’s favorite country singer? What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure? Who did the horse ask to be his second wife? 24. Unfortunately all the others came in at 12.30. Black Beauty… Now there’s a dark horse. First came one of the straight guys and his wife. Q: How do you get a wild horse to accept a halter? 70. A: He was hoping to get a kick out of it. A: The cook stirs today's lunch, whereas the gay stirs yesterday's dinner. A: He lays his cards on the stable. A: HORSE BACK RYDER. Q: What is the best type of story to tell a runaway horse? A: A herd animal. A: Pay him under the stable. Q: How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse? Because it was a little horse! Haay.. (using your gay hand movement … Q: What’s the quickest way to mail a little horse? Q: How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse? A: Because it was a little horse! The big guy replies, 'Well mate, before you tell that joke, you should know something. HAYYYYYy. 27. A horse walks into a bar. #69 – 60. A: With Southern Horspitality! A: Because somebody shouted hay! What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino? A: A tale of WHOA! A: Pay him under the stable. A: Neigh buzz Q: What did one horse say to the other horse? 97. 76. 2. Stable tennis. Favorite Answer. A: Fast Food. Three friends -- two straight guys and a gay guy -- and their significant others were on a cruise. Les Listes is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites. It came in so late they had to pay the jockey overtime, 64. What was the horse’s best ballroom dance? What kind of bread do horses like to eat? Q: What do you get if you cross a horse with a bee? A horse walks into a bar. 79. Funny horse jokes, dumb horse puns, and a healthy round of "horse walks into a bar" jokes that are guaranteed to cause unbridled laughs. Q: What type of a computer does a horse like to eat? 87. Do you NEED to HAVE a good TRACK record to MAKE music ON a LOCOMOTIVE.......? ", What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Q: What’s the best way to lead a horse to water? A: The pace is familiar but I can’t remember the mane. A: Thoroughbred. 47. Some poor horse is walking around in his socks. Q: What do you call a baby donkey? A: … Horse Plays Dead Anytime Someone Tries To Ride... Reports Of A “Dead Horse” Turns Out To... 15 Horse Terms That Really Confuse Non-Horse People, Troy Wright Photography Captures The Spirit Of America’s Wild Horses, Have You Seen This Horse? Perhaps because it's a big part of the farmer's animal helpers, or maybe because it's such a beautiful animal that, until recently, was our main means of transportation. A: Stable Tennis. A: The horse’s name was Friday. 49. 1 decade ago. A: The Broncos. Q: Why did the horse cross the road? A: Maine. Actual Russian Joke Four Russians were being pulled in a sleigh by a team of horses in the dead of winter when they noticed a pack of wolves had started chasing them and were slowly gaining. You loved money too much. What did the horse say to his friend that didn’t come party last night? Do you love horses? A: ITS A LITTLE HOARSE. Where do you take a sick pony? 67. Q: What is a horses favorite song? 32. Q: Why did the horse cross the road? ), or just manually add the email addresses you'd like to keep in your contact list. Q: How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday? A: Long enough to reach the ground. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy, submissons by: cumberbatchrina, ronbirdmusic, helena.uskrsni.zeko, 1POSTMAFAI, meridithlamb, ashley.hathaway.2007, rutroooo, alexysd, rski, polorbear12704, ziyanasmith12, itsybitforrest, Iseniasalonas, Rijoe10, paul1shane, jones.linda196181, zoeravenreid, johndeerekid, mzcozmo, sballentine55, sdunham, privatejohnson22, Yahiradrianmier, KenzieAlexander, showla, shaunab52, jordanmoore, miahopkins2003. Q: Did you hear about the horse that wears condoms? A Tennessee Family Is Lost Without Him. Mascarpone. A: Because they can’t achieve full horse power without gas. How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him? You’ll find the best horse jokes, including colt jokes, mare jokes, foal jokes, race horse jokes and more. A Macintosh. 68. Q: What do race horses eat? And the other rabbit says, "We're going to run for it you idiot I'm your brother.". Did you hear about the depressed horse? The barman confuses idioms with jokes and offers him a glass of water, but can’t make him drink. In case he takes offence. Wild horses graze on large areas of land, eating grass, the seed head of grasses and other edible shrubs and plants. A: A zebra! A: “Why the long face?”. Some poor horse is walking around in his socks. Then as he was about to leave the house, he paused and asked, 'Is there anything else that your lover doesn't use anymore?' Q: Where do horses go when they're sick? A: "I've fallen and I can't giddyup!" ;) ~A. What do you call a horse going down a waterslide? 5. . What cheese should you use to hide a horse? 65. Q: What did the horse say when it fell? It’s a terrible tale of WHOA! A: A burrito! Kitty Perry. 67. Why can’t horses dance? What do you call a horse that can't lose a race? Why should you never be rude to a jump jockey? Fast food! Q: What’s invisible and smells like hay? A: Use the Pony Express. She tends to go on but never really does anything worthy of serious repentance, so when she's done just give her 10 Hail Mary's and I'll be right back." 96. A: The doctor told her she needed to eat like a horse. A: Horse farts. Q: What do you call a well balanced horse? Do PILOTS that HAVE a LOT of CRASH landings HAVE a bad ALTITUDE......? Q: What disease was the horse scared of getting? What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability? What's black and white and eats like a horse? What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse? A: I can't take your order. Q: What's the difference between a cook and a gay? Funny Horse Jokes. 54. 19. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?”, 63. Q: What did one horse say to the other horse? 89. Surely 10 Hail Mary's would not do. Q: How does a winning jockey communicate with his horse? . 42. Either way, the horse appears in so many classic jokes and puns, almost 200 of them are right here in this collection for your enjoyment. Jockey. . [I know this joke by heart because somebody in my class says Heeeeeeeeeeey everyday <-- that rhymed], the gay man being sent to the electric was told he could have one last wish-he said "I'd like to blow the fuse". A: Mane St. 45. 68. 84. Q: What do you call a promiscious pony? A: In the pasture A: His horse’s name was Friday! To return Click Here. Q: What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds? Where did this joke come from? Why do cowboys like to ride horses? What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom? What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse? Has BK made the IMPOSSIBLE happen for the VEGANS......? A: Because it rides up on them! What do you call a horse that moves around a lot?

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